@jantarei bro ko 'bau ko birta hora bhanney' dialogue , ek dum satik lagyo.. totally agree with you. mailey bhanna khojya ni tehi thiye suru ma.

@citizen of nepal, you envy us because of our lifestyle here. who knows  you may be trying hard to get over here.. ha ha ha ha
kohi kohi hola, maal payera pani chaal napauney haru,, jastai yi maathi ka 'depressed' nepali, yaha aayera arkai utsah hunu parthyo, tara khai.. chaina ta, tehi biraktiyera basi ra cha..
tara j hos, 'citizen of nepal' nepal ma basya bhaye ni, 'LOSER' chahi khatti milayera bhando rahechau.. natra yaha america ma baseka bhanauda haru ajhai pani 'LOOSER' bhanera baschan..

@kundan, I dont' really want to humiliate him based on my income. I'm not really that kind of person, no matter how much money do I have, I don't really like to discriminate ppl on that.. manchey ko sochai po ramro hunu paryo ni, yesta nepali lai nepal ma na-aaija bhanney bajraswath sanga k mukh-mukha laagnu..

Feel sorry for that guy guys, we all depressed in one or another way as we came here we sleep too much miss classes we just work work work u know, i ahve a roomate too he went to school 5 yrs but never graduated and he gave up before graduating, he just had 2 semesters left he said college is just a waste of time, he sleeps all day just manages to go to work but very helpful when it comes to giving laons and cooking dinner and cleaning, he loves to smoke lots of cigarette and drink lots of beer and aprty all the time and its funny to hear his stories how he had sex with his girlfriend in the kitchen or on the computer table when his father in law id sleeping in the next room u know

It is interesting that most of the people on this thread judging this man...feel that they are above being in his situation tomorrow.

 This guy obviously feels rejected from everywhere and few to anyone has tried to understand him.

It is obvious this guy feels out of place. He feels lost. He feels like he doesn't belong. He can't depend on his family in Nepal and he can't depend on friends in the States. Everyone sees him as a problem. He is probably feeling hopeless. Everyone is judging him and few people are taking the time to understand things from his perspective.

How many people are talking to him and asking him how he is feeling? He is obviously under a lot of stress and pressure. He also seems to be suffering from language barrier.

Ideally it sounds like he should be undergoing counseling in a nurturing environment.

But, most of the time, the love that we Nepalese know how to give people in his situation is to chastise him and tell him to get his act together. If he was an American, he would have received a lot more support. It is his unfortunate karma that he was born a Nepali.

So what will happen tot his guy?
Most probably he will get thrown on the streets where he will be another homeless person that people will call crazy. All because he did not receive timely support from his community. It is not his fault that his community doesn't have the resources to support people like him in their time of need.

@ku-citizen of Nepal
wasn't he the one who decided to give up Nepali citizenship on his own will? And so, tell me why
Bro just to enlighten ur ignorance he hasn't gave up Nepali citizenship yet. Even those who are on green card are still Nepali citizen.

I am sure, those who do, come from your family tree.
Don't wanna comment. No one has right to talk about other's family.
Or else, you would know that there are good many Nepalis who are upteempth times richer than your average American
Like u said don't be a retard. First America is not ours. Second, if you think Nepal is superior to America financially ...................... I don't wanna even say any word..
There are lot of nepalese who went abroad learned something new and helped Nepal. Did u forgot Arniko ??? He also left Nepal for a while. Bro just do not envy/ hate who are abroad. They are as much Nepali as u are. If someone loses right to comeback to Nepal just coz he went outside for a while then half of Nepali will not be Nepali anymore. All people from terai, government officials and technicians in different fields will not be Nepali anymore.

 i don't think anything is wrong with this guy its perfectly normal not to take bath for 2 weeks unless someone tells ur gross, not talk about problem suck it up yourself and deal with it yourself  don't eat anything except junk foods, drink alcohol and spill in the laptop accident happens sometime, not speak english properly sleep day and night its perfeectly fine this is how he chooses to be quit college this all are not the sign of depression until and  unless doctor approves it he is normal person everybody does it its sign of grown ups seriously this is how this guy chooses to be and may be he is like that its his origanility its perfectly fine and perfectly legal and perfectly normal  . i don't understand is it bad to do  like that
its not sign of depression its sign of grown ups and individualism the only problem here i see is mahodaya is unemplyed and broke
and he should be worried about earning more money other everything will be settled down itself and get job in places where he don't have to speak english lot  . 

@bittertruth @ goddamn

So you think we envy your "lifestyle" there in the US?

What village in Nepal are you from???

Stupid PAKHE...

 Citizen Of Nepal!

You are an embarrassment to all things Nepali. You are a dis-illusioned, dogmatic, rabble-rouser who does not know the difference between his mouth or his ass*ole. You DONOT represent ANY part of Nepal and have NO RIGHT whatsoever to say you don't want this dude back.

Here's what you are buddy - 

A jealous jealous retard. Jealous because YOUR FRIENDS got sick and tired of YOU and chose to go live somewhere else for a couple of years! Increase your spatial awareness, people probably hate you for your ridiculous logic!

A butthurt misguided patriot. Who's your idol? Lets hear it. Are you being patriotic cuz you saw someone being truly patriotic and said to yourself "ill be like him" but you missed the part about where he had all his experience and education? So basically you want to move "out of the slums" without any hard work and effort?

Man, FK people like you, you ruin our country's image. NEVER ENDING PEACE AND LOVE. Did you just randomly forget about the last part? LOVE. Love your people man. Doesn't matter if they went out of the country. Doesnt matter if they went and lived in Mars.

FK you dude. Grow up and educate yourself.

"Love your people man. Doesn't matter if they went out of the country. Doesnt matter if they went and lived in Mars."-- cacophonix
Liked it.

What village in Nepal are you from???
I am not from any village bro and i can assure you that i had better lifestyles than most of the people in Nepal when i was there.
Ani yatro din pachi reply aayo ta, k ho 4days hidnu paryo ko cyber bhako bazaar samma pugna ki office banda bhayera net chalaunai payena???

What do you think the focus of this thread should be?

http://sajha.com/sajha/html/index.cfm?threadid=94892#846894
I thought about stealing some ideas from the above thread:

We have different options to inspire this man out of his depression. Which of these below would be effective do you all think?
1) Praise him - focus on the positive and tell him all the positive things that are happening in his life instead of focussing on all the things that are going negatively
2) Pay him - pay him with compliments, positive thoughts, inspiring quotes, anecdotes
3) Shame him - yell at him, tell him he's useless, make him feel bad
4)  Respect him - empathise with him and show that we all have at one point or another been depressed and down. Tell him how other people helped us out of this situation. Show him that anyone could be in his situation and show how they got out of that situation.
5) Appeal to their sense of humanity - inspire him by telling him how if he gets his act together, what a positive impact he could have in other people's/Nepalese life
6) Appeal to their conscience - try to explain to him how him being depressed is affecting the other people in his life.
7) help him dream - try to paint a very positive picture of his life 20 years from now that takes into account all the things that motivate him.

 

I am quite sure that I know who this person is. This is his story. This is how he got the personality that he got. This is why he is depressed.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sanjeev was a top student in class two. He topped every class except English. English was Sanjeev’s weak subject. But other than that, he had the highest numbers in every test in class two. His parents were really proud of their son’s accomplishment. They paraded him around in family gatherings, beaming with joy, telling their relatives about Sanjeev’s educational accomplishments.

But as Sanjeev grew up, his father noticed that his son kept blinking his eyes over and over. He was 10 years old and everytime he started to watch TV or to do his homework, he would start squinting and blinking. Sanjeev’s father, Roshan, had the latest style of leather jacket. He was very conscientious of how he looked while on his raised Honda motorbike. Looks and fashion were very important for Roshan.

"What a bad habit you have Sanjeev," his father, Roshan said, whacking the son on the back of his head. "Stop blinking your eyes like that."

Year after year, Sanjeev's eyes kept blinking more and more. He kept squinting and blinking. His parents found his squinting and blinking very unattractive. They really wished their child would stop doing it. It made the kid look a little bit crazy. In their desperation to make the child stop, they hit him every time they caught him doing it. It was their way of discouraging the child from doing it.

Finally, when he is about 15 years old, his parents took him to a doctor. The doctor did a thorough checkup and said, "Oh my goodness, this boy’s eyes have been getting successively worse year after year. That is why he has been blinking so much. Why didn't you bring him to me much sooner? He should have been wearing thick glasses years ago. Now this issue has caused permanent damage to your son."

When they took Sanjeev back home, Roshan profusely apologized to Sanjeev that they had missed all the cues. Sanjeev said, "But what about all the hittings I got for all those years? What about all my pain that I went through all those years when you didn't understand what I was going through? How is your sorry going to make up for the permanent damage I am going to suffer from for the rest of my life?"

Sanjeev’s father, Roshan, glared at his son. Here he was, the father, apologizing to his son, but Sanjeev seemed rude and rebellious to his apologies. Who did Sanjeev think he was? Roshan didn’t have to apologize to anyone. He was the father in this house dammit. Roshan did not owe Sanjeev anything. Sanjeev had not brought any income to this house or contributed here in anyway. Why did Roshan need to feel guilty towards Sanjeev?

After this incident, Roshan was very hesitant to put himself in a vulnerable position of apologizing to his son. He was afraid that Sanjeev might use the situation to lash back at Roshan. Roshan became very cautious in how he interacted with Sanjeev. He almost seemed to fear his son in some ways. It was almost like interacting with his son had the power to open up deeply held childhood wounds within Roshan. Wounds that he had locked away in a deep safe when he was a young child in his father's house.

Roshan became very cautious in looking at any signs of hostility from his son and did whatever he needed to quell Sanjeev’s indignancy and rebellion. Roshan was going to crush it in Sanjeev with whatever it took. He was the father and would be damned if he was going to sit quietly in his own house with Sanjeev becoming more arrogant and feeling more entitled and angry. Roshan was not going to be a sitting duck in his own house. He was going to nip Sanjeev's attitude in the bud.

Any small deviation did not go unnoticed. And the hittings and kicks came swiftly and strong. Sanjeev bore it all, gritting his teeth.

Sanjeev’s marks in school was dropping each year. Each successive year he seemed to be doing worse in school then the last. He seemed to lose interest in school. Sanjeev got in more fights in school with the other boys. He seemed drawn to the rougher kids.

Roshan saw this and winced. Sanjeev overheard his father talking to the neighbors explaining how Sanjeev had become a problem child.
So Sanjeev was not surprized that father's getting physical only increased.

But all the hitting did not quell the fire burning within Sanjeev. The more Roshan beat his son, the more wild, bitter and determined Sanjeev seemed to get. His mother worried what was happening between father and son. This going back and forth seemed to be ripping the peace in the family apart. 
Sanjeev wasn't listening to her anymore. He seemed more callous, more hardened. He had a feral look in his dark eyes. It was almost like he enjoyed fighting, hitting others and getting beaten by his father. She could see the look of satisfaction in his eyes, like a bear that emerged from a bloody tussle. It was like he was communicating to his father that his father was weak and he, Sanjeev was strong. Sanjeev, through his steady stares at his father, despite how much his father beat him, seemed to say, "You don't have the power to change me." It was almost like Sanjeev was controlling his father through his bad behavior.

The worse Sanjeev acted, Roshan had no other choice but to beat and kick Sanjeev. And though dressed in bruises, Sanjeev smiled bitterly and defiantly back at his father. He, Sanjeev, had caused his father to raise his hand on him. His father was a weak weak man who had no other choice but to do so.

Roshan would hit Sanjeev and curse at him, but he would avoid looking directly into Sanjeev's eyes. He just couldn't. Sanjeev, meanwhile, would look penetratingly and deeply into Roshan's eyes with a wicked smile on his face and then raise his eyebrows at his mother.

And as much as Sanjeev was winning the battle at home, he was losing the war in other places. Over time, Sanjeev started to lose his memory. He would feel lost and not know where he was. He would sit queitly for long hours on the benches in Ratna park or under the Peepal tree in New Road, just gazing at the random vendors passing by. Tempos, minibuses and taxis would roll by caressed by Sanjeev's uncaring glance.

It wasn't any better in school. It was very hard for Sanjeev to focus on school. He didn't seem to enjoy socializing and having fun. The other kids in school his age would make fun of him behind his back, but they were afraid to say anything directly in front of him. Sanjeev's gritted jaws and his piercing eyes held them back. It didn't take a lot to set his fiery fists pummelling.

In private, these kids would gossip about Sanjeev. They made up all kinds of stories saying he was crazy and had mental problems. Few of them understood what Sanjeev was going through with his dad at home. Few cared. Sanjeev was just a source of entertainment for them. So they embellished the stories they told about him. Each would tell about some interaction that they had with Sanjeev in bigger more colorful words than the other. They competed in ridiculing Sanjeev. Their vicious words tried to eradicate the fear that Sanjeev had instilled deeply in them. And strangely, they walked away from tiffin time, feeling good painting him as a useless clout.

definately homey jee,
                                      ur writing style and content of writing is amazing and this is all kalpanik i guess and the way of ur thinking is also really different and unique and good . i don't understood one thing though is that blinking of eye thing caused by beating of father sanjeev to roshan i am sorry i didn't understood that part . seems like behind every depressed person lies history may be sad history may be good really homey jee i like the way u see the things in really deep from the root amazing please keep it up .

better to send him..

 होमे कान्छो, फेसबुक/इन्टरनेटमा भेट्टाको कथा लाई भको-नभको कुरा थपेर लम्बेतान बनाउन जस्लाई नि आउँछ! अनि "मैले त्यो केटालाई चिन्या छु, यो तेस्को कथा", भनेर कस्लाई उल्लु बनाउन खोज्या? काम छैन, ट्याम ट्याममा नचाहिँदो बक्वास लिएर आउछ! अरुले लाइक गरुन, ओहो-आहा गरुन, साझामा नाम कमाउन पाइयोस भन्ने ठुलै धोको छ जस्तो छ तिम्रो। लौ वाह-वाह खोज्या होइन? एत्रै सिती, दिएँ मैले तिम्लाई thumbs down!

mahodaya jantare1,
                                   hazor le dislike garno bhako rahecha kina hola easto ramro lekh cha rachana cha creativity pani cha maile mahodaya jantare1 ko kura bujhna nasakera like garde phere . ramro bhaneko ramro ho naramro bhaneko naramro ho thik bhaneko pakkai pani thik ho bethik bhaneko pakkai pani bethik ho . pakkai pani mahodaya homey jee ko lekhai sandarvik cha ra make sence pani huncha nepal tera bau ama le chora chori kutno bhaneko kunai naulo kura hoina teacher le student kutno kunai thulo hoina student student bicha ma jhagada hunu kunai thulo kura hoina pakkai pani mahodaya jantare1 jeu le bhaneko kura nikai nai sandarvik cha make sence hune type ko cha tara malai eauta kura le rahasya ma pario i got the impression tyo ke ho bhane ke sachikai tyo bau sanjeev le aafno chora roshan lai kutera testo nalayak banaeko hota ki choro roshan nai fataha ho yo chai rahasya nai hune bho jaba samma honey jee aafai yo rahasya kholno hunna. 
                                    mahodaya jantare1 lai kina homeyjee ko lekhai naramro lageko ho maile chai bujhna sakena easto ramro easto sandarvik cha . about nas i have already made my point by making thread that i am not chamcha of nas i even went in his site and asked him am i your chamcha he said no so no i am not his chamcha definately not . mahodaya jantare1 ramro bhaneko ramro ho ra ramro lai wah wah bhannu pakkai pani ramro kura ho

 intelligent guy, 
i agree that whay homey wrote here MIGHT BE (i'm not saying IS, stress on MIGHT BE) saandarbhik, assuming that the guy this thread is dedicated to went crazy because of torture from his father. but the thing is home lied saying that he knows the guy and what he wrote is the guy's story. but, the truth is, what homey wrote is nothing but a stretched story found on facebook. observing homey's trend of writing and response in threads, it's pretty clear to me that this guy is after popularity - one way or the other. i'm not saying gaining popularity is a bad thing. but it is bad when you post lies and same thing over and over again.
don't agree with my stand about homey's lie? here, please your rods and cones: 
http://sajha.com/sajha/html/index.cfm?threadid=94522
homey himself posted the same story back in november, and edited today (link above); and now he uses the same story to claim that he knows the guy we are talking about.

Jantare,

I'm not exactly sure what it is that you are trying to say about me. Please at least try to be direct. Be straightforward. I'm right here.

aba nepalima lekhya ni nabujhyaa ho ki bujhera ni bujh pachaako ho, thaha bhayena. ma mero time waste gardina yaha. jatinjel samma tyo pachayeko bujh farkidaina, maile maathi lekhyaa kura dohoryai-teheryai padha. 

Jantare,

In that case, since I don't value your opinion, I don't feel it necessary to respond to it. Hope you don't mind.